Announcer: You are now tuned in to KingNews, Your Place for Brian’s Face!

Ivanna:  Good Morning Augustians from around the world and welcome to the Ivanna and Chet Morning News Brief on KingNews.   As you know, this special news programs covers any and all material from the ever expanding King network and we make it our goal to bring you the most comprehensive, fairest approach in the news industry.  Let me pass it over to my co-host, Chet Theodore Franklin, CTF for short.

Chet: Thank you Ivanna Play .  It is indeed a fine morning today, and we’ll get more into that with the weather report a bit later on, but now our top headlines.

Apparently during the off season, Mr. Brian King lived in Oakland, California after last summer ended and got a job selling plates and bowls during the holiday season.  This might sound a bit strange to our regular listeners, but our subject found a way to make the job more interesting by breaking out into spontaneous song and dance at the cash register, and constantly finding a way to make his fellow co-workers smile and enjoy their day as well.  But the highlight of the off season for Mr. King himself was when he spent a month and a half living in Portugal!  We’ll have all the details on that a bit later on in the program, Ivanna…

Ivanna: Thanks Chet.  Another top news story is that we have 100% accurate verbal reports that Mr. King is “AMAZINGLY EXCITED AND HOLY GEEZ ECSTATIC!!!!! OH MY GOODNESS HECK YEA!!!!!!!!” about returning for a second summer at Camp Augusta.  If you remember our summer reports from last year, you will recall Mr. King having some pretty extreme times at camp including paint ball dodgeball (you will have to ask him about that one yourself), practicing Parkour pretty much every day (and loving every second of it!!) and having some AMAAAAAZING times in Cedar Village.  So, with some of that Augusta camp experience already under his belt, he is ready to take on another summer full of challenges, adventures, art, dancing, water and some of the most creative craziness he has ever witnessed.  Chet…

Ivanna:  Dear valued news listeners, today we have a special section in our news program to remind everyone why we are here and how we came to be.  This is meant for people just joining our news community from around the world to learn a bit more about who we are, and also for our time-honored veteran news listeners to be reminded why KingNews has constantly been one of the top rated news programs in the Northern Californian region. 

Chet:  Every day I am approached by someone who recognizes my face and asks me, “Just who the heck is Brian King and why does he have his own news network?”  And, although it would take days to fully answer that question, I tell them a little something like this:

“Brian is from the DC area, and he took a trip
He went all around the world, but got a little sea-sick.
Once he returned, he began to yearn, for some silly camp magic!
And so he came to Augusta, full of wish, wonder and surprise.”

And when those people ask me why the last line doesn’t rhyme with the rest, I tell them that not all things in life make sense and to contact Brian for further details, which I strongly encourage you to do.

Ivanna:  This network has been operating for about 24 years now and our complex history keeps on growing.  Through the bowl-shaped haircuts and awkwardness of high school, through the asking of deep searching questions and adventure trips in college and through the cross country road trips and cultural traveling in the modern era, we have always been here to report what we experience and to give to world a glimpse into the life of brian king. 

Chet:  Speaking of which, we will now move into a segment called Culture Happens.  In this segment, we review a culture from around the world, which Brian has recently learned about.  This time, Brian has learned about Portuguese culture as he worked in Portugal for five weeks during the off season.

Ivanna:  That’s right Sandra.  During his stay in Portugal, Brian stayed with an older, retired English man doing work around his building sites.  Brian cleverly found a way to work on average about 6 hours a day doing whatever needed to be done in exchange for a place to sleep every night and food in his belly every day.

Chet:  During his time there, he was able to explore the surrounding village and even had a chance to work in a local bakery!  And, I believe we have a picture documenting that experience, yes here it is…

Chet:  He interacted and made friends with a lot of the locals and lived a simple, clean, healthy country life.  But, even though Brian might have been living off the map for a while, we hear favorable reports that he is ready and jazzed up to come back to his summer home.

Ivanna:  Speaking of summer, let’s go to our weatherman, Joel Sunshine-n-Smiles, for today’s forecast. Joel…

Joel:  Well the weather out here in Northern California is currently being affected by a draft of Giant Swingers and Zipliners making their way through our area causing high winds.  But, fortunately there seems to be a swell of Hammock Villagers coming up from the south and that ought to calm things out.  But be warned, this is the season for unexpected water-hose soakings and uprisings of the massive storm system commonly known as El Oatmeal Fight, so keep your eyes open.  Back to you guys in the studio.

Chet:  Thanks Joel, well it looks like our time is running short again, so we’d like to take a moment to look into the future to guess what might be in store for Brian.  As we all know, it has been an interesting and exciting ride so far and we can only guess that the future will have more of the same.  Whether that means more traveling and moving around for Brian, or if it means settling down in one area for a while to become immersed in the local community and develop practical skills, we’re not exactly sure.  But what we are sure of is that whatever he ends up deciding, he will do it with passion and will make the absolute best out of his situation.

Ivanna:  That’s right Chet.  And, listeners have no fear, because no matter where Brian goes in the world, we will also be there to deliver the most up-to-date news which you have been accustomed to.  We know that his life can often appear very scattered at times, but know dear audience that we pride ourselves in having the best inside information available in order to deliver the best news we can.

Chet:  And with that, from all of us at KingNews, have a wonderful day and don’t forget to smile.